Keyboard Warriors

I recently watched Constance Hall's video about the online bullying she has faced since appearing in the public sphere. It made me cry.

I know who Constance Hall is, what she does and that to some people she is ‘polarising’ but I don’t read her articles, I haven’t watched her interviews and I don’t watch her on DWTS. But I totally relate to her now after seeing this video. 

Her video spoke to me because I too have felt her pain. Not anywhere near the level which she has but I have still had my own experience of being targeted my people’s online comments.

‘Keyboard Warriors’ as they are known are rife, they are a dangerous plague of people that need to be eradicated. 

This plague seems to be everywhere, commenting on everything and they often lurk around the same websites, commenting on countless articles that appear on there a day. 

While I respect everyone’s right to have an opinion and to disagree with opinions of others, there seems to be a line which cannot be seen by these individuals, where disagreeing morphs into bullying and where being cruel to others is OK. 

Well it is not OK. Feel free to disagree with the opinion I have but do not bully, slander, hasrrass and be deliberately cruel while doing so. 

Just because I write for the media on a public forum DOES NOT MAKE THIS OK.

I recently wrote a piece on an Australian Women’s website about purchasing a pregnancy test. The site is a women’s network where a wide variety of stories are told- some serious topics and issues, some everyday experiences and events, it covers a wide variety of subject matters. 

I predominantly write about parenting, not because I am an expert (far from it) but because I love to write, often my stories relate to experiences other people share or can relate to and if i have some piece of knowledge on something that might help others I like to share it. 

 It is also a job. One which I like to do without being attacked.  

So up went my pregnancy test article on Facebook, within minutes there were over thirty comments which means one of two things, people are on your side or, in this case, they are not. 

And either way is ok, that is the risk you take when you write these articles, some people won’t agree with you. The component I take issue with is that people feel the need and believe they have the right to write nasty things about you, PERSONALLY. 

They somehow think they know you and can make personal comments about what you are like and what sort of person you must be as if they have known you for years.  

Commenters will offer me advice mostly in condescending ways to try and belittle me, they criticize my experience and my thoughts often without even reading the entire article, or even half of it (FYI you can tell) and just jump on the hate bandwagon for whatever reason.

They judge my reactions, my response, my thoughts, my feelings, my actions and make assessments on them. And they do it in a way that is unnecessarily hurtful, cruel and that would be considered bullying in any other context. 

These were comments directed at me or about me when this article was recently published.

“What a diva”, “she needs to pull her head out of her arse”, “bitch”, “get a life”, “no one cares what you think”, “dead set idiot”. 

So here is a little introduction about me.

Hi, I am Shona. 

I am a diva when it comes to coffee but that’s about it.  I actually grew up in what some people would call the ‘Ghetto’, driving around in a falling apart Datsun, so not really diva-esque.

My head seems to be quite stuck onto my neck and quite removed from my arse and I am not that flexible that it could ever get in there, so that isn't quite accurate.

I may be a bitch sometimes but am generally described as “caring” and “thoughtful”.

Yep, a pulse, yep, a heart beat, definitely still alive, so therefore I definitely have a life and do not require another.

I get paid for my ideas so I do think people care what I think.

Dead set idiot - perhaps debatable but if you measure me up educationally I have a Masters Degree so perhaps not a ‘dead-set’ idiot? 

As well as writing I have a family, two young girls and a husband that love me. I have family and friends like you, some of whom are quite ill at the moment (so for those people who think I should “swap a problem” maybe it is something you should reconsider). I also suffer from mental health issues which I am not ashamed of and that I manage well. 

I am a person too. I write as a job and tell stories about my experiences. You don’t have to like them (or me) or agree with them, you can disagree and you can say that but you know what you don’t need to do? 

You don’t need to say these sort of comments because these are the sort of comments that hurt people, that impact their mental health, that create undue suffering and that can be a cause of people taking their own life. Is that really the sort of impact you want to have on someone?

If you say yes, it would actually make complete sense as to why you are acting like a complete shitty person but if you say no, maybe it is time to stop and think before you post?

You may think you, with onelittle commenthas no effect but YOU DO.

And that is not fair. That is NOT OK. 

In reality,  you don’t know me. Just because I write articles on a site about my experiences does not mean you know me. It does not give you the right to write these disgraceful comments about me, my life, my abilities, my children.

Share your opinion, that is ok, don’t say anything, that is ok but personal attacks when you do not know someone is not OK, not for Constance, not for me, not for anyone.